84 [Voice]

[flameandpassion]

[There is a pause before the girl that was in a dozen pieces begins to speak. Her voice is quiet, free of the normal conviction and bravado that she would normally have in such a situation.]

Tell me where I'm needed.

[She has no right to call the shots when this is half her fault.]

Comments

[al_truism]

... why would you do something like that?

[He just looks... beyond horrified.]

[flameandpassion]

[She hasn't broken down yet. She is only running on adrenaline and force of will -- to just keep going. But at Al's expression, and the question -- it nearly causes her to break into the sobs that she really needs to let out.

But her jaw tightens and her breathing becomes faster and Mars manages a tight:]

Because I thought --

[And her voice breaks, but she manages to get a grip, though her voice becomes softer and less mechanic.]

-- I thought separating them, creating order among them, trying -- it would fix it and I was tired of not being able to keep people from dying and -- it had already been done with Aelia but it was a trick and when this -- Ekpyrosis --

[The more she talks, the more she babbles, until finally, something breaks, and the girl finally starts to cry. It's quiet, and barely there, but her breath is hitching, and her words are barely able to be made out.]

I wanted to make this city safer and I helped destroy it.

[al_truism]

Oh dear.

[Al's voice is heavy, saddened and worried and sympathetic and frustrated with his helplessness.]

Sometimes the absolute worst things come from the very best of intentions. I know that all too well. I can't fault you, and I won't blame you. I can only thank what goodness there is in the world that you're alive.

We can fix this, Rei -- if we all work together. Will you help me?

[flameandpassion]

[She's forcing herself to get a grip -- crying is useless and she's acting like a child and she needs to stop crying over something that is her fault -- and she manages, drawing in several shaking breaths, before she manages to keep her voice as even as it's going to get.]

She won't have the honor of killing me permanently.

[Quietly.]

Tell me what you need me to do and it'll get done.

[al_truism]

I need you to tell me everything that happened down there.

[flameandpassion]

Aelia was summoned weeks ago without incident. She and John talked -- it's all on video, if you want to see it. I can forward it to you. He showed it to me when he was finished.

[There are no more secrets, not anymore. Nathaniel can deal with it. She draws in a deep breath.]

After that, we set to work on summoning the fire Animus -- and I insisted on coming along because I thought I could be of help. I've talked to it before, on its own, and it was coherent. And he put in countless measures to keep it from escaping -- and if he died, the Animus would cease being summoned, and go back to where it came from. But then Aelia showed up -- and Ekpyrosis was too powerful -- and when Aelia showed up, she --

[Here, her voice breaks, but she grits her teeth to keep talking, because Al asked her a question, and she was going to answer it, goddammit.]

-- murdered him. And left me alive a little longer.