flameandpassion | 52 [Accidental Video]

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52 [Accidental Video]

[There's a series of slammed doors, when the PCD turns on -- anyone who has been inside of it will recognize the Temple of Heaven -- and anyone who pays attention will see that the reason for the slammed doors is quickly approaching the device.

Rei is opening doors, looking inside rooms, and slamming them shut.

Over. And over. And over. And over. And over.

It's a large temple, after all. There are a lot of rooms to look through.

But once Rei has reached the final door, the one closest to the PCD, she is breathless, her fingers are trembling, and she yanks it open with much more force than absolutely necessary. The door slams into the adjacent wall and the PCD manages to look inside it, quickly -- an empty, unused room -- before Rei slams the door shut so hard that the wall shakes.]

Damn it --

[It's choked through a sob as she turns away from the PCD, her shoulders trembling, as she struggles to get ahold of herself. The trembling soon turns into full out shaking and Rei turns, her back hitting the wall, so she can sink to the floor, her hands burying themselves in her hair as she cries.

Sometimes, it's just one last straw to finally break the camel's back.]

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[Are they going to do the awkward silence thing? Hitsugaya knows it all too well to want to go through it with Hino.]

Lately there's been a trend of people disappearing and reappearing shortly afterward.

[She's not trying to do the awkward silence thing -- but Hitsugaya's statement causes her to close her eyes.]

I know.

[She leans forward, slightly, to hold her head in her hands.]

... it's not that she's gone, it's -- I've seen Usagi ressurrect worlds. I've seen her bring people back to life. She's the most powerful person in the universe, she's sealed away evil itself --

[There's the slightest hitch of breath, but Rei chews on the inside of her cheek, hard, to stop it before it starts.]

If the Animus can take her away without any trouble at all, what hope do the rest of us have?

We have the same chances we always had.

[It's not a comforting thing to say. The opposite, really. But it's the truth.]

We've known from the beginning that the animus have almost complete, if not complete, control of this place. Shinigami, demons, humans, gods. As long as they're here, the animus are able to limit their abilities and manipulate their surroundings in order to control them.

It doesn't feel that way.

[It's quiet.

It feels as if the Animus just ripped whatever hope she had of conquering this place right out from underneath her.]

[...Well. Damn. Hitsugaya is quite possibly the person least qualified to give someone hope. He's not exactly a very positive, optimistic person, and what little encouragement he does give is laced with cynicism and reality checks. How do you convince someone there's hope when you yourself don't see it?

He sighs, looking up momentarily before bringing his gaze back down, folding his hands between his legs.]

It will probably never feel the same way it did before again.

[There's a quiet hum of agreement, and Rei stays quiet, for a few minutes, to digest that thought. Life crumbles, in Adstringendum, and hadn't it been Al that had warned her that Usagi would crack, but she would keep going?

It's funny, how Usagi had escaped before she could do so. Rei supposes she should be grateful, for that fact, but instead, she feels impossibly lost.]

... Usagi would say that we made a promise to take control of this city and promises can't be broken, no matter what.

Someone has to do it. You're the one still here.

I'm not doing it without you.

I wouldn't let you.

[Have half a smile, Hitsu, before she sighs to herself -- mostly in faux exasperation.]

Not that I'd get a chance to -- you know, I've spent my whole life wondering if anyone else can do what I do -- sense energy and darkness and stuff, but it's really annoying that everyone knows where I am at all times.

[Between you, Ulquiorra, and Szayel, Rei has no privacy. 8|]

The same should could be said of how you use your abilities.

[She opens her mouth to argue, but in the end, she only huffs and crosses her arms.

Because he is right.]

[Ding, ding, ding. Winner.]

-- looking into the future isn't cheating.

Or -- following people around.

[Or creepy. Shut up.]

No one said anything about cheating.

[And, well. If she really doesn't approve of it, maybe it would be better for him to stop.... Not that he'll say that out loud. It would just worry her again.]

You know what I mean.

[She doesn't... actually mind -- if it makes him feel better, by all means. It only gets annoying when she's around people that she knows won't hurt her. And sometimes it makes her feel like she can't take care of herself. But those are all her issues, not his.]

You want to make your own mistakes without having people around at all times to save you.

[She stiffens, ever so slightly, at the blunt statement. Rei likes to think of herself as mature, sensible -- but the twist in her stomach says otherwise, because the statement is completely and utterly true.

She leans her back against the step behind her with a frown. No, it's more than that -- because being babysat, that was aggravating, and it ticked her off like nothing else, but the real problem had absolutely nothing to do with her.

Rei contemplates not saying anything at all, but that would almost feel like an insult. Her eyes roll to the sky and she narrows them slightly.]

... If I have to be saved, then I can't protect.

...Very well.

[He only nods, no other physical indication of what he may be thinking or what he means by the simple statement.

Keeping an eye on everything he could has always been his way of preventing things like what had happened last week. As long as he could control something, could gather information and actually use it, then maybe he was doing something worthwhile while he was stuck here. In all of his two years, however, it's rarely shown positive results. Just as Hino said she felt she didn't have the same chances as she had before Tsukino had disappeared even though it was never actually her chances that had changed, Hitsugaya had come to realize what little control he'd thought he had had never existed in the first place. Is a farce like that really something he should continue to pursue?

Not only does he not truly have the ability to stop these things from happening, he doesn't have the right to insist they shouldn't happen. Hino survived an altercation with Satan. She has connections with virtually everyone in Adstringendum. She can sense evil, for heaven's sake. It's more than he's done. So if she doesn't want to be saved, he has no right to try.]

['Very well'? What was that supposed to mean? Rei hadn't asked him to do anything or even suggested he do anything, so why on Earth would he say something like that? He wouldn't even say something like that even if she had asked him to do something, not unless it was something drastically important.

Rei straightens, slightly, to look at him a little more carefully. Her expression is hard to read.]

Toushirou. Never stop trying to protect the people here.

[It's quiet, before Rei tugs on his sleeve lightly, with just the tips of her fingers.]

You're still one of the first people I would go to if I ever needed anything. That isn't going to change.

[Again he doesn't push her hand away, but he does look down at it a bit grudgingly. That may just be because he doesn't want to meet her eyes though.]

Maybe it should.

It's not going to.

[Without hesitation, with the same fierce loyalty that she has always had.]

[He's quiet for a moment before lurching forward, his knees opening up as his bent elbows push them apart, the palms of his hands pressed over his eyes. It's not a sob that follows though. It's a laugh. An uninhibited, loud, dangerously overwhelmed laugh.]

Of course not.

[Ha. Ha. Ha. It's so. Damn. Funny.]

[She instantly reaches out a hand, when he lurches forward -- because the last time this happened, he wound up vomiting over the wall of Adstringendum... but when he laughs, Rei freezes.

She has barely seen Hitsugaya smile, let alone laugh, in all of her time here. And for him to sound so completely lost and overwhelmed is, quite frankly, more terrifying than seeing him retching over a wall.

Usagi would know what to do, to fix it, to make it better. But Rei is supposed to be Hitsugaya's friend -- she's supposed to be able to know how to make this better, but she can't. How could she? How could you possibly fix something like that?

What would Hitsugaya do, if Rei had killed Usagi? What would he say? Would he shun her and condemn her and tell everyone never to speak to her again because of what she was capable of? She doubted it -- it would probably be quite the opposite. But it's always different, when it's you -- and the burden Hitsugaya is carrying is so large that even Rei can visibly see it now.

One hand finds his shoulder and her voice -- while she tries to keep it as steady as possible, because over her cold dead body is she going to cry in front of Hitsugaya Toushirou -- is trembling.]

If you think that I'm going to turn my back on you, then you're an idiot.

[Her voice catches, ever so slightly, in the last word.]

[He takes a deep breath when her hand rests on his shoulder. Then he takes another one, just to be safe. When he answers, his voice is steadier, though not as devoid of emotion as he'd like. He doesn't move, not even a hair. Only the rise and fall of his chest.]

Tsukino is going to be fine, Hino. It's ridiculous to worry about her. If anything, you should be worried about every other person you know because they will probably put themselves in harm's way to protect her. Whether the animus took her or not will not affect the outcome of your war. She'll win because you morons protect her with your lives.

The animus are not good or evil. They're a mystery. If you intend to solve it, you can't afford to believe they have complete control over you or this world. We are looking for a way to usurp their power. If you focus too much attention on the fact that they may control who comes and goes, you may miss a momentary display of weakness.

You still have allies here. Use them.

[And that's that. Another deep breath as he continues to stare into the strips of color flashing across the insides of his eyelids.]

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[offline] Gah. Where did that "should" come from? :|

[offline] The Animus. ... or something.

[offline] ...yeah. Let's go with that.

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